Don't sweat the small stuff

So, some things that are different here:

Only locals can get their windows on their cars tinted (go figure)
The driving here is appalling (ok, maybe that's not so different to home, but I mean WAY WORSE here)
Everything is covered in sand all the time (Pam, you're in the desert, with a beach as well, I hear you say - but really really didn't think it was THIS bad!)
No local is ever in a rush to do anything, the word deadline is a laugh a minute (you people in Advertising - I mean WAY WORSE than anywhere else as well). In fact, the most commonly used word is Inshallah (god willing). I liken it to the South African 'Just now' meaning, when I get around to it, if I feel like it.
The service here is appalling
I get called Miss Pam everywhere I go
You don't get speeding fines sent to you - you have to register your car every year, and when you go in to do that they present you with a years worth of fines, and you cannot re-register your car until you've paid them (so yes, some people have to shell out 10 000 AED in one go!)
Cars are ridiculously cheap
Petrol is ridiculously cheap (another obvious one, yes yes, but REALLY cheap)
You need a (personal) liquor licence to buy booze at a bottle store. And they are only allowed to sell you a certain percentage of your monthly salary, every month. Thank goodness I make OK money ;-)
There's no such thing as weekend drinking, everyone goes out any night of the week they feel like - especially Saturdays (before work on Sunday!?) and Sundays. Hardcore!
Everyone here does brunch on a Friday - starts at 12h00 and goes till 16h00. It usually ranges from 100 AED to 400 AED, depending on how swanky the venue is, and it's free food and booze for the duration. Needless to say, it's carnage ;-)

More to follow...